Sunday, July 12, 2009

Bad Week!

I'm a bit lost for words or whatever. It seems as though not much changes from day to day. It was a real discouraging week. The progress is so much slower than I expected. But the setback of the virus and reoccurance of ulcers has made things tougher. I pictured myself up and moving as I haven't in years by now. Funny thing, my body had other things in mind. I am now hoping that I'll be feeling much better by the end of the summer and even then, I'm not sure. I will just have to take whatever is given. I don't have control over that. But I do have control over my attitude. The last week, even that has not been good. I will do better this week. I have to. It isn't fair to my family to have a physically sick mom and wife, as well as feeling sorry for myself. This has affected all. Even my precious little grandson. He is soooo worried about me. He cried and cried the night I went to the ER. When I see him now, he just runs and jumps into my arms! How I love him and his darling baby sister. They were a big part of me wanting to get better.

Our neighborhood had a block party last Friday. I was really nervous to go but I wanted to try. I haven't seen anybody since this began. I was worried that people wouldn't know what to say so they'd not say anything. Hello! I have it here for everyone to read about but what do you say? Everyone was so great! I love it when people talk to me about the whole deal and you'd be surprised at how many suffer with addiction. I'm not. Not at all. Anyway, thank you all for being so great and for all the words of encouragement. Especially the prayers. I know that the faith, hope, and love of my family and friends have helped me make it this far. I love you all. This has been and will continue to be a very humbling experience, a refiners fire and for that I am grateful.

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